Good morning Beautiful Friends. Today is an emotional day in my world. Seven years ago today I lost my beloved Mama and eight years ago today, my beautiful Grandmother. We also lost an uncle a few years before that on this day and a young boy in the community committed suicide just a year ago today. This day represents a day of loss and pain and heartache in my world. It is a day of unanswered questions and grief. To look for the startling graces of God today is asking a lot and will take some deep digging.
The first Grace of God that comes to mind is how He eases pain over time. This goes hand in hand with the tremendous loss I am feeling today. I have noticed that as the years go by, the pain becomes easier to bear. While I will never forget my Mama or my Grandma, the pain is much less than it was immediately after their deaths. Talk about startling Grace!!! Those first few days, weeks and months after their deaths were a blur of life, pain, and tears. I wasn’t sure I could go on, especially after my Mama passed. But God kept the light of their spirit very much alive in my heart and soul while slowly easing the pain of their loss. If that isn’t God’s beautiful, startling Grace, I don’t know what is.
Another Startling Grace that comes to mind is the word “Enough”. Throughout the last year there have been many times I felt I was at the end of my rope, that I didn’t have anything to carry me through or help me go on. So many times I didn’t have enough money for things or had to make a difficult choice between 2 necessities. It was in those times that someone would appear out of nowhere to offer help, a rebate check would come in the mail, or a better option came along. God provided exactly what I needed exactly when I needed it, never too little nor too much, always just ENOUGH. What a true blessing!
The third (but nowhere near final) Starling Grace I have discovered today is the peace I feel in my heart with life in general. For years I suffered with anxiety and depression. While there is still some of that lurking in the dark recesses of my heart and mind, my Faith and His Grace have brought a peace to my heart that I have never known. I worry less about little things, allowing me to focus on and enjoy the important things. I still stress over money, being alone, the house, etc., but I don’t lose sleep over it and I can enjoy those moments that bring me such joy.
Wow, who would have thought that on a day full of nostalgia and reflection, God’s Beautiful, Startling Grace would be so clear and obvious. I am so grateful for my loving God and Savior, for His love for me and for His grace. I know that even though my Mama and Grandma are not with me physically, they are here in spirit. And the best thing yet is I know I will see them again one day and there will be much rejoicing in Heaven.
God Bless you my Dear Sweet Friends… Look for God’s Startling Grace in YOUR life and hop over to Miss Anna’s Blog at A Messy Indulgence and see how she is doing counting her blessings.
Love to all… Sheila